Monsters Read online

  `Got any coffee?' he asked.

  `Huh?'

  `I didn't think so. Never mind, I'll pass.'

  *

  By the time he got the horse meat, some of the guys left the tavern to go tell their friends about the crazy visitor. Who would have thought, just as Zack was in the middle of his dinner, our Shaman walked through the door.

  You gotta know something about our Shaman. Well, ex-Shaman anyway. He hated humans all his life. With his intimidating appearance, he never bothered to keep his opinion secret. He had a problem with someone, he told 'em. Just like that. Yet, when he came in and saw Zack, he didn't even frown. Dunno what he was thinking at the time, but I'm sure he saw a golden opportunity right there. He wasn't stupid, you know.

  He walked to Zack's table.

  `You like that meat?' he asked.

  Zack looked up at him.

  `Not bad. Not bad at all!' he told him, following it up with a nice healthy burp. Then our Shaman did the unthinkable. He smiled.

  `I like you, kid. Tell me, what brings you here?' he said, and he sat down.

  `Just passing through. I'm a traveler.'

  `Are you looking for something around here?'

  `Nothing specific. Just thought I'd check out the so-called forgotten continent for myself. Never been here before.'

  `How do you like Mor'peri so far? Had any trouble? Any assaults?'

  `Nah... But I can take care of myself, so I wouldn't care.'

  `Yes, you look like you can handle yourself. A mage, am I correct?'

  `What if you are correct?'

  `Want a job?'

  `Like I said, I'm just passing through here.'

  `I meant a one time task, not a long term occupation. It will not take long.'

  `Tell me what you have in mind. If it picks my curiosity before I finish dinner, I might do it.'

  `Did you see the tower to the east of here?'

  `No, I came from the other direction.'

  `It's not far, maybe an hour's walk, less if you walk fast. There's a mage living there. He's been a thorn in our side for far too long.'

  `What do you mean with that?'

  `Bastard thinks he owns us. He wants tribute. But he ain't gonna get it... The ingrate! We bow to no-one!'

  `So, why don't you just kill him?'

  `That's the idea. Thing is, he's too powerful. His magic allows him to flee every time we almost have his head on a pike! That's why I need you...'

  `Me?'

  `You're a mage. You can help us kill that bastard! Make sure he dies before he can flee. Or better, come with us to his tower and help us force our way in. Something we don't have the magical power to do. Then we can kill him in his own lair. It would be fitting!'

  `What's in it for me? I don't do favors for free.'

  `We'll pay you well.'

  `Coin?'

  `Lots of it!'

  `What if I don't want coin?'

  `What?'

  `Do I look like a mercenary? Or an assassin? Come on... Coin? Fuck that! I want something more interesting!'

  `What do you want then?'

  `Dunno.' he said, shrugging his shoulders. `I am an explorer of sorts. I like to experience unique things. Things I never had a chance to do before. Things that can help me learn something new. Can you offer something like that?'

  The Shaman rubbed his chin for a while, and then he replied in an almost mocking tone.

  `You know, I think I do.'

  `You do? Well, what is it?'

  `I guarantee you that this is something you've never experienced before. If you help us kill that cursed mage, I will bestow upon you the right to challenge me for the leadership of this town. No human has ever had this privilege.'

  `So, you're the chieftain or whatever?'

  `Chieftain? I see you know little of our culture. But I will be generous and forgive your ignorance. I am the Shaman.'

  `Aren't you Shamans supposed to be mages?'

  `Not necessarily. The Shaman is the spiritual leader of a tribe, and leads at times of peace. The Khan is the military leader who leads at times of war. I am both, though not simultaneously. As long as we live in times of peace, I am the Shaman. If we had to fight a war, I'd be the Khan. Magic knowledge is no requirement for either position.'

  `Well, I guess you don't consider the mage to be a big problem if you haven't declared war yet... Anyway, what is this challenge about?'

  `It is a duel. One on one, you and I. By our rules. But what I offer you, is the right to challenge me. That right alone is a privilege for one like you. You do not have to challenge me if you do not want to. The right itself will be an honor that none of your kind were ever bestowed upon before!'

  `You know what? I'm in. I like this reward! I never did something like this before.'

  `So, the deal is done. Good! Are you ready to go?'

  `Let me finish my dinner first. That mage will still be there in ten minutes, won't he?'

  `Fine then. I will have two of my best warriors accompany you.'

  `I can take care of this alone.'

  `Perhaps, but I do not want that. I don't want you to kill him for us, I want you to help us kill him. This is our problem, we must solve it! You we just need to assist us. You will go with them to the tower and break down the door. When you find the mage in the tower, you just use your magic to prevent the wizard from escaping. My warriors will do the rest.'

  `Alright, but they'd better be real good!'

  `They're the best!' said our Shaman, and then he looked around in the tavern. When he spotted me, he said: `Errak! Go find Pinky! The two of you will go with this man, and kill that son of a bitch!'

  `Sure thing!' I said, and headed for the door. Just before I left, I still heard how they traded introductions at the end of their conversation.

  `On behalf of our people, I thank you for choosing to aid us in this little... extermination! I am Tarakosh. What is your name?'

  `I'm Zack Sands. And no, I am not dead.'

  *

  Whatever the Hell he meant with that last remark, I have no idea. Perhaps some people took him for dead, I don't know. Anyway, I went to find Pinky, and we went back to the tavern. We found Zack just in front of the tavern, stretching and yawning.

  `You're finished, I see!' I told him. `I'm Errak! This is Pinky.'

  Zack turned towards Pinky, and he had a hard time looking him eye to eye. Well, you remember Pinky, and how big he is. Anyway, Zack stared at him with such awe, that Pinky thought to get ahead of possible insults.

  `You say just one word about how I look like a fucking troll, and I'll rip your head off and kick it across the sea!'

  `Now why would I say that?' asked Zack, briefly raising his hands to his chest in a defensive gesture. `You don't look like a troll. You look like an orc. You're just... big.'

  `Shut up! That's just what I mean!'

  `Okay, okay...'

  `Don't mind him, man!' I told Zack. `He's just hungry for blood. That damn mage has been pissing us off for way too long.'

  `So let's finish him off. What's his name, anyway?'

  `The slimy little worm never bothered to introduce himself.' said Pinky. `We have given him a name though. Graa-bzacha.'

  `Graa-bzacha?'

  `Yes. It is orcish, and it means fucking faggot.'

  That made Zach laugh out loud.

  `Ha! That's a good one! I'll remember that. So, where's the tower?'

  `To the east. I'll lead the way.' I told him.

  It took a little over an hour to get there. Zach and I could have gotten there quicker, I guess, but Pinky walks slow. We talked a lot with Zack during this time, and I got to like him a lot. He told me that he was a planar traveler, that he wanders the Planes, looking for knowledge. He explores other worlds, where cultures evolved differently than in Arghard, and he tries to learn from them. He seeks to understand the great secrets of the Multiverse. It is this thirst for knowledge that drives him. He has had his fair share of battles during his travels,
as many of these worlds hold unknown dangers for travelers. We exchanged some stories about memorable battles. He told me of some of his encounters, I told him some of my own battles. It was nice to recall those old fights, and I think he liked to think back to his own struggles. In the end, he told me how much he feels that fighting is always worthwhile. He summed it up in a simple sentence: If you haven't fought for it, you haven't earned it. I gotta say, I agree with that.

  Well, eventually we reached the tower. Back then it wasn't such a ruin like what you have seen. It was at least sixty feet tall, and while it was old and lost much of its glory compared to what it must have been like when it was built, it was still impressive.

  `So, there it is.' I told Zack. `The tower of Graa-bzacha.'

  `Let's break down the door and find him!' said Pinky.

  `No, wait...' said Zack. He looked at the tower with narrowed eyes, like he was thinking hard. Then he looked at Pinky, and his club.

  `Hand me that thing for a minute.'

  `What do you want with it?'

  `I will enchant it.'

  `Forget it! I like it as it is!'

  `It's only temporary, it will wear off in an hour. I'd need a silver coating to add a permanent enchantment.'

  `Fine, but if you break it, I'll break you in two!'

  Zack touched the club with his right palm, and then it flashed brightly for a second. After the flash, the club was dimly glowing in a bluish color.

  `Done. Now stay still.'

  `Why?'

  Zack waved his hand towards Pinky, and a transparent, shimmering sphere appeared around him.

  `What the fuck is this?!' asked Pinky.

  `It's also temporary. It will protect you from the rubble.'

  `What rubble?'

  `The rubble that will fall on you when you start pounding on the tower wall with that club of yours.'

  `Huh?'

  `You want to kill this guy, right? Well, why not teach him a lesson while we're at it? Go there, to the side of the tower, and start beating on it with your club. With your strength, and the enchantment on the club, you will sooner or later make it collapse. Just remember to run when the tower begins to fall...'

  `You're kidding me... You want me to break down the tower?'

  `Without his tower, he will be defenseless. He'll come out before it collapses, if he's smart. Then, Errak and I will kill him. Simple, ain't it?'

  `What if he won't come out?'

  `Then the rubble will crush him.'

  `Heh, that sounds better! Alright, I'll do it.'

  *

  So, Pinky went to the base of the tower to try and break it down. I never believed he could actually do it, but Zack seemed pretty sure of what he was doing. As Pinky was taking position, I asked Zack about it.

  `Can he really do it?'

  `Maybe. Even if not, he will cause enough damage to lure that bastard out.'

  `Why don't we just go in there?'

  `Because this is more fun!' he said, and he pulled out a strange object from his belt. It was like a short iron stick bent like the corner of a square. He was holding it like a crossbow, actually, but it was much smaller, and there were no bolts, and no bowstring. There was however a trigger-like thing on it, and a small hole on the front of it.

  `What the Hell is that?'

  `This is my SMG 11000.'

  `Your what?'

  `SMG 11000. SMG as in Sands' Magic Gun. Model 11000, my latest construction. It holds a maximum of one thousand standard magic charges, has eleven different shapes, and all of them kick ass!'

  `Huh?'

  `Never mind. It's like a wand, alright?'

  `For a wand, it looks odd...'

  `This thing can take many shapes. I designed it after several different weapons I encountered during my travels among the Planes. Each shape of this wand fires a different projectile, each consuming a different amount of charges. This basic form you see now, consumes just one charge per shot. Now, this form...'

  As he said that, he did something with the wand that made it change its shape. It became a three-foot long iron tube, with a couple of small handles of sorts in the middle.

  `This form takes fifteen charges per shot, but it does a lot of damage...'

  `Looks weird... Kind of big for a wand.'

  `I guess. The original weapon that I based this on, is called a rocket launcher.'

  `What does it do?'

  `Well, you aim the front of the tube towards something, then, you press this little button here...'

  He aimed his weird wand towards the top of the tower, and just when Pinky started pounding on the wall of the tower, he pressed the button he was showing me. Then, something was fired from the tube, and when it hit the tower, it exploded into a huge fireball! And man, was it loud!

  `There you go! Instant demolition! Ha!' said Zack with a smile.

  `Awesome, man!'

  `Wanna try it?'

  `Sure!'

  `Okay, here you go. Just aim towards the tower, and do what I did.'

  He gave me the wand, and I aimed its tube towards the tower, and pushed the button.

  And man, sure as Hell the same thing went down again! And what an explosion it was.

  `Cool!' I said, as I gave him the wand back. `How come I could use this thing? Isn't a wand supposed to need an activation word or something like that?'

  `Basically yes, but this is not a wand. It's just something like a wand.'

  `I don't get it.'

  `Never mind. Just watch.'

  He fired the wand at the tower again, and another big explosion followed. Large pieces of the wall were falling off, and I heard Pinky shouting.

  `It's working dammit! Working! Ha!'

  As he was beating on the wall, the tower seemed to shake, over and over again. That was when I started to believe that he might actually break it down...

  Zack in the mean time aimed the wand again. Then the cursed wizard suddenly appeared in front of us, out of nowhere.

  `What is the meaning of this?!' he demanded, angrily.

  `Are you the one they call fucking faggot?' asked Zack warmly. `Pleased to meet you! Let me introduce ourselves. I'm Zack, and this impressive orcish warrior beside me is Errak. Now, say hello to my little friend!'

  As he said that, he tapped his wand, aimed the barrel of it towards the mage, and fired it.

  I was certain it would be over, that the explosion would rip him to shreds, but no. That cursed mage had some kind of magical protection, and despite the explosion, he somehow survived. He was blown far back by the shot though. Zack fired the wand right into his face, and the explosion tossed him backwards by at least twenty feet...

  Zack lowered the wand, turned it back to its original shape, and put it back in his belt. Then he stretched out his right arm, and a black thing that looked like a tentacle crept forth from his hand. The tentacle slowly turned into a sword. A big, black sword, with lightning crackling across the blade.

  `Now let's get to the good part!' he said, and he moved towards the mage.

  Graa-bzacha slowly got to his feet. His face was covered by soot and he stood there like he just fell twenty feet down, but he was still breathing. He motioned towards us with both his arms as we approached him. A moment later, a dozen strange creatures appeared in front of him. They were a mere five feet tall, but still intimidating. It looked like they were entirely made of sand, except for the swords in their hands.

  `Destroy them!' screamed the cursed mage, and the creatures attacked us.

  They never stood a chance. I mean, yeah, they were tough and all that shit, but they were nothing compared to me. Of course Zack was there, too. Turned out that his black sword was not just impressive looking, but also very effective, and Zack knew how to use it. And me, I am so good with a warhammer, that those creatures never would have stood a chance even if I had been alone! Zack's sword even created these five little magic missiles of sorts each time it caused a severe wound to one of those things, and then these missil
es flew into the creatures and damaged them more. All in all, we had the upper hand!

  So, naturally, we defeated them all. We hacked them up pretty good, we kicked their sorry asses and made them regret being born, if they were alive at all...

  Once we cut them down, the mage was left alone. We went closer.

  `No, wait!' he pleaded. `I will give you coin, riches! Just spare me...'

  `You know, this is not your day!' said Zack, and he lunged forward. He thrust his sword into the mage's chest, and that cursed bastard screamed in agony! It was music to my ears, to hear his death wail. Yes indeed...

  The mage fell, but wasn't dead yet. So I raised my warhammer high and struck with it, right at his skull. Graa-bzacha's head was crushed completely by my blow and pieces of his brain were splattered all around him. Some of it got sprayed in Zack's face.

  `Motherfucker...' he said, as he was wiping the brains out of his eyes. But I ignored him, raised my warhammer to the sky and let out a war cry for our victory. Zack himself was more a silent sort, so he didn't scream with me. He did praise my fighting skills though!

  `You fight well, Errak!' he said, when he was finished rubbing his face clean.

  `Yes, I do! Did our Shaman not say that I am the best warrior in Coldrock?'

  `If you're the best, how come you're not the Shaman?'

  `Bah, that kind of stuff ain't for me. I'd rather be the second guy in charge. You know... I can still boss people around, and if things go bad, it's always the Shaman who gets the blame, and not me, heh!'

  Suddenly we heard Pinky shouting towards us.

  `Ruuuuuuuun!'

  We looked towards him, and saw that the tower behind him was falling. In the heat of the battle, we got pretty close. Too close, in fact. By the time we realized what was happening, Pinky already passed us by, and was running faster than I ever saw him run.

  Zack's eyes went wide, and he turned around and ran. And so did I.

  Fading

  The study of Supreme Councilor Jenathar, City of Re'Cas, present day (1 year, 1 month, and 7 days before Twilightfall)

  I take a deep breath and cast the spell. The glass rises from the desk and levitates upwards at my command. It moves towards the window. Then back. Then towards the door. Then back. Then it floats to the center of the room. It floats there, motionless, as if it was resting there on an invisible pedestal. Then it floats upwards and begins to draw a warding rune in the air. When the rune is complete, it flashes briefly, then slowly fades. The glass begins floating in circles. Slowly. Once. Twice. Thrice. On its fourth time around I blink. The spell ends. The glass falls and shatters on the floor. I sigh.